Vices – Why We all Need Them

Tea and Wine Vices 2

Back in the mid-1990s my vice of choice was Bacardi and Coke I used to drink a lot of it before going out clubbing with my friends. Then one night I got so sick on it that still to this day, I can’t bear the smell of Bacardi.

I’ve dabbled a bit with the vice of smoking over the years, I’m lucky in that I was never addicted, it was more a casual flirtation with Marlborough Lights which I pursued whenever I had a drink in hand.

After the Bacardi episode, I moved on to drinking white wine but I soon discovered that had its own issues; it used to make me emotional or worse, aggressive so I ditched that and began my love affair with red wine.

It has been my vice of choice ever since. I have been known on particularly stressful days to have a glass or two at the kids’ tea time, sometimes out of a mug if I’m feeling guilty about drinking in front of the children, I mostly manage to hold off until the kids are in bed before cracking open a bottle.

My 2 Main Vices

Red Wine

Tea is my daytime saviour I drink a lot and it helps to power me through especially as our daily wake up time now seems to be inexplicably set at 5.30am. I wish I drank coffee as it sounds so much more glamorous and I’m sure it’s a lot stronger!

So these two vices – red wine and strong tea I look upon as dear friends of mine. Without meaning to sound like an absolute nutter, I treasure them, they absolutely help me in coping on a regular basis to get through the stress and strains of the day. Anything from trying to placate a raging, foot-stamping 2 year old about why she can’t wear a sundress in February, to wrestling the 4 year old into the car to make her go to school, to chasing down a payment from a freelance client.

These 2 vices are so dear to me that I named my blog after them.

Other Mum Vices

I know other mums have vices which include regular massages, manicures, chocolate binges, cinema nights and frequent gorging on cakes.

Along with tea and red wine, my other vices are: writing. I’ve always enjoyed writing whether it’s scribbling the random musings as part of this blog, or writing for clients as part of my freelancing work. I love the creative process of getting things out of my head and on to paper. It can be very cathartic!

My only real other vice is spending a bit too much time on social media which I think everyone does.

Lincoln Vices

Guilt and Vices

Most vices carry a set amount of guilt don’t they?

Whilst I don’t have any problem with my tea drinking, I am aware that my love of red wine is a bit of a bad habit. Don’t get me wrong, it’s in check, but I don’t ever want it to become a complete crutch. I make a conscious effort to have a few nights off a week (which can be tough!)

My writing can at times cause me some level of guilt, mostly because outside of my few childfree hours during the day, I’m trying to snatch bits of time here and there whilst juggling the kids before doing more once they’re in bed. I regularly have guilty moments where I worry that I’ve just plonked the kids in front of the TV for an hour or so whilst I try and get scribbling.

But what I’m realising is that unless you have a hard core drug or drink vice, or a vice that is so out of control that it becomes all consuming, we really need to ease up on the guilt.

It’s OK to have vices. In fact, it’s positively necessary to have our vices in order to get through the day.

We are all doing our best. Whether we’re a stay-at-home mum battling with a feisty toddler, working mums that are juggling the demands of trying to fit everything into the day or a part-time mum like me who is trying to fit my working life in around the children.

I’m realising that letting the kids sit in front of the TV for an hour or so is not going to kill them, they have enough stimulation from me during the rest of the day. And more than that, if I’m happier at having snatched a bit of “me” time, then the kids are happier too.

Most of us seem to have worries or general anxieties about something in our life. Most of us are openly or secretly dealing with some kind of problem, some kind of pain, fear, or self-confidence crisis. Is it really so bad that we get through it by having a little bit of what makes us happy?

I don’t think so.

Unless it’s Bacardi.

Do you have any vices? I’d love to hear what they are and if you have any intention of giving them up!

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0 thoughts on “Vices – Why We all Need Them

  1. We all have vices or habits. Blogging is time consuming but we love it. Could I be playing more with my children instead of writing maybe but they are getting older & can entertain themselves more. I love white wine but do have to be careful as it’s too easy to drink an entire bottle 😊 #bigpinklink Lifeinthemumslane

    1. Yes, that’s what I’m hoping for as my two get older. Not meaning to wish the time away of course! I’m the same with red wine! Thanks for reading. X

  2. We all have our vices but as long as we keep them in check and they aren’t harming us, I think it’s okay. I enjoy a drink on a weekend but I don’t drink in the week. The vice I’ve developed that I really need to stop though, is a cheeky cig after having a drink on a weekend – much like the flirtation with Marlboro Lights that you said you used to have! I don’t think about smoking at all in the week but after a drink, I’ll begin to fancy one. It needs to stop, really! #AnythingGoes

  3. I like my bourbon at the end of the day, and still smoke a handful of cigarettes a day. I totally know better, but there are worse habits to have.( thats what I tell myself )

  4. I enjoyed this. My vices are probably biscuits and beer, but actually any junk food and most alcohol- haha. I’m also terrible for getting carried away with a book. I haven’t been able to do it so much since having a baby but I used to have days where I would suddenly realise I had spent four hours reading! #bigpinklink

    1. Ooh yes, I love it when you get sucked into a book and realise hours have passed (like you – rarely these days!). Yes biscuits and booze are dangerous again at different ends of the day! Thanks for reading. X

  5. Oh no don’t tell me that writing is a vice, I’m in trouble then! Although my other vice is terrible. I binge watch Pretty Little Liars on Netflix. It is really rubbish but I am so addicted to it. It drives my husband insane but before that it was Keeping up with the Kardashians. I should be ashamed of myself

  6. I love this!! It’s very honest, and I’m pretty sure everybody, parents or not, will relate to it!! I know it sounds strange, but my daytime vice is houmous!! I can’t seem to get through a day without it!!! I start craving it as soon as I get up, and struggle not to keep going back to it all day!! I’m with you in that my evening vice (and like you I have occasionally partaken during a very stressful bedtime!) is wine. I just love it! I’ve heard other people say that white wine makes them emotional, but I’ve never found this. I’m in conflict with this too, because I keep trying to give it up to see if I can lose some of the baby weight still hanging around, but I can’t do it! And like you say, there has to be some pleasures in life! And I always have ‘tv time’ guilt too, but remind myself that the children get taken to playgroups, play dates and parks every single day, so an hours tv a day definitely will not hurt them!
    Thanks so much for sharing with #bigpinklink!

    1. Houmous!! That’s a new one and at least is healthier than cakes, chocolate, cigarettes and booze. Don’t worry about the baby weight, your sanity is more important. Thanks for hosting and reading. X

  7. I have found that tea has become something I ‘need’ within a day since going on maternity leave. I was fine before but the long days at home have allowed me to have more (allbeit cold) cups of tea during the day and now if I don’t have one in the morning I’ll get a headache. I’m just about to go back to work, so kind of hoping I can wean myself off it a bit! #TwinklyTuesday

    Helen x

    http://treasureeverymoment01.blogspot.co.uk/

  8. My big vice lately is cake/pastries – I kind of feel like I deserve it after a long day of chasing after a baby. I know it’s unhealthy, but I’m walking my daughter in the buggy so much that it keeps the weight off, so…pass the brownie! #TwinklyTuesday

  9. I think I have lots of vices, too much blogging and social media being top of the list followed by wine and coffee, oh deer, best not to think about it too much, we only live once! #TwinklyTuesday & #abitofeverything

  10. I love this post and how realistic and honest you are. You’re so right – we should let go of the guilt, We’re all doing the best that we can. My vices are very much like yours – writing (and the accompanying amount of CBeebies), and tea. Not so much wine with me (despite my name) but definitely cake! So much cake it is sometimes obscene!

    Thanks for sharing.
    Dawn x
    #abitofeverything

  11. Ha ha fantastic – do I know anyone who doesn’t have a vice? I doubt it – mine are pretty similar to yours but in terms of white wine and coffee as opposed to red and tea but the social media thing too – what a total addiction? And I don’t want to describe it as a time waster because that’s not what I think of social media but nothing (and I mean nothing) is getting done around the house these days! #twinklytuesday

  12. I have an addiction to trashy daytime TV which sucks hours out of my day! I guess it’s a vice as I know it’s not good for me but I prefer nicer vices (crisps!) or traditional ones (gin!) Moderation in all things though and we can enjoy our vices!

  13. Totally agree with you! Oh I love vices! Tea and CAKE are mine and of course wine too. Couldn’t live without them. #bloggerclubuk

  14. I had a similar incident with Southern Comfort and coke, oh no it’s Lemonade, I decided I was too cool for coke! Well any way I don’t do SoCo any more!! I have no alcohol vices at the moment, I’ve gone off the stuff completely. Give me chocolate any time of the day and I’ll be happy! Did your love of wine increase as your kids turned into toddlers? Mine is 8 months and I want to like wine but Im just not into it!

    1. I’ve always enjoyed wine more in the last few years, not sure if it’s because of me being older or the kids! Chocolate vice is still healthier than wine! X

  15. Hi Cheryl, I am lucky in the fact that I don’t have a taste for alcohol, I do enjoy the odd glass of Callinco Red (which is a locally made red wine), but I can go weeks/months without having a glass. That’s not to say I don’t have my vices, I do. Cadbury’s chocolate being one of them and salt and vinegar Pringles would be another (luckily we only get the salt and vinegar Pringles over here in the summer).

    A stressed out Mum isn’t a happy Mum, so plonking the children in front of the television every now and again isn’t a bad thing.

    xx

    1. Thanks Debs. I gave up wine when I was pregnant and it was hard to begin with, but then I got used to it. Not sure I could do it again now though! Pringles and chocolate are good ones! X

  16. hello fellow tea addict. I can not live without a cup of tea. I once tried to stop drinking it but I got withdrawal symptoms of headaches, being sick and shaking, as soon as I had a tea those symptoms went away. It was official I was addicted. #Bloggersclubuk

    1. Hah! I limited myself to two cups of normal tea a day when I was pregnant and then had decaf which never tasted the same. I’m totally addicted to tea! X

  17. I really needed to read this after a busy week (a fellow freelancer, *waves*) I have felt the guilt trying to meet deadlines and also appear not to be neglecting my kids!

    My vice is so dull, I have a real thing for Twirl bars at the moment, obsessed with the things. I do imagine that if I announced to people that I ate two Twirls in one sitting yesterday they would look at me in the same way as if I said I’d been doing crack ha ha!

    #bigpinklink

  18. I think I have lots of vices, I know I have. Not switching off from work. Too much blogging and social media and oh Diet Irn Bru. I try not to over think it. xx Thanks for linking up #abitofeverything

  19. Yep red wine is definitely one of mine and I am missing it so much – some days when I get home from work I just think I will open a better and everything will be better. However I am 35 weeks pregnant so its been replaced with chocolate! I can also relate to the guilt! I also every now and again put Monkey in front a film so I can catch up on the blog otherwise it just won’t happen. I can’t pull the all nighters like I use to because I am so tired all the time with pregnancy. Enjoy your red wine I think one or two vices is no bad thing 🙂 thank you for joining us at #BloggerClubUK hope to see you again this week x

    1. Ooh yes chocolate will have to see you through until you’ve had your baby! I was anaemic in my second pregnancy and discovered Green & Blacks dark chocolate which is in danger of becoming another vice! Thanks for hosting, back again tomorrow! X

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