Back in the mid-1990s my vice of choice was Bacardi and Coke I used to drink a lot of it before going out clubbing with my friends. Then one night I got so sick on it that still to this day, I can’t bear the smell of Bacardi.
I’ve dabbled a bit with the vice of smoking over the years, I’m lucky in that I was never addicted, it was more a casual flirtation with Marlborough Lights which I pursued whenever I had a drink in hand.
After the Bacardi episode, I moved on to drinking white wine but I soon discovered that had its own issues; it used to make me emotional or worse, aggressive so I ditched that and began my love affair with red wine.
It has been my vice of choice ever since. I have been known on particularly stressful days to have a glass or two at the kids’ tea time, sometimes out of a mug if I’m feeling guilty about drinking in front of the children, I mostly manage to hold off until the kids are in bed before cracking open a bottle.
My 2 Main Vices
Tea is my daytime saviour I drink a lot and it helps to power me through especially as our daily wake up time now seems to be inexplicably set at 5.30am. I wish I drank coffee as it sounds so much more glamorous and I’m sure it’s a lot stronger!
So these two vices – red wine and strong tea I look upon as dear friends of mine. Without meaning to sound like an absolute nutter, I treasure them, they absolutely help me in coping on a regular basis to get through the stress and strains of the day. Anything from trying to placate a raging, foot-stamping 2 year old about why she can’t wear a sundress in February, to wrestling the 4 year old into the car to make her go to school, to chasing down a payment from a freelance client.
These 2 vices are so dear to me that I named my blog after them.
Other Mum Vices
I know other mums have vices which include regular massages, manicures, chocolate binges, cinema nights and frequent gorging on cakes.
Along with tea and red wine, my other vices are: writing. I’ve always enjoyed writing whether it’s scribbling the random musings as part of this blog, or writing for clients as part of my freelancing work. I love the creative process of getting things out of my head and on to paper. It can be very cathartic!
My only real other vice is spending a bit too much time on social media which I think everyone does.
Guilt and Vices
Most vices carry a set amount of guilt don’t they?
Whilst I don’t have any problem with my tea drinking, I am aware that my love of red wine is a bit of a bad habit. Don’t get me wrong, it’s in check, but I don’t ever want it to become a complete crutch. I make a conscious effort to have a few nights off a week (which can be tough!)
My writing can at times cause me some level of guilt, mostly because outside of my few childfree hours during the day, I’m trying to snatch bits of time here and there whilst juggling the kids before doing more once they’re in bed. I regularly have guilty moments where I worry that I’ve just plonked the kids in front of the TV for an hour or so whilst I try and get scribbling.
But what I’m realising is that unless you have a hard core drug or drink vice, or a vice that is so out of control that it becomes all consuming, we really need to ease up on the guilt.
It’s OK to have vices. In fact, it’s positively necessary to have our vices in order to get through the day.
We are all doing our best. Whether we’re a stay-at-home mum battling with a feisty toddler, working mums that are juggling the demands of trying to fit everything into the day or a part-time mum like me who is trying to fit my working life in around the children.
I’m realising that letting the kids sit in front of the TV for an hour or so is not going to kill them, they have enough stimulation from me during the rest of the day. And more than that, if I’m happier at having snatched a bit of “me” time, then the kids are happier too.
Most of us seem to have worries or general anxieties about something in our life. Most of us are openly or secretly dealing with some kind of problem, some kind of pain, fear, or self-confidence crisis. Is it really so bad that we get through it by having a little bit of what makes us happy?
I don’t think so.
Unless it’s Bacardi.
Do you have any vices? I’d love to hear what they are and if you have any intention of giving them up!